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Monday, May 12, 2008

be anxious for nothing

but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

phil 4:6-8

i guess i never really thought i'd have to write an update like this one....my ultrasounds have usually gone well and we've always been given the "a-ok" from the doctors with both pregnancies so far.

today, just hours ago actually, i went in to have an ultrasound to see if my placenta had moved. it had! that was a concern earlier and they were just double checking to ensure that i'd be able to deliver without a c-section.

i was really grateful for the news, but that joy became worry as the ultrasound tech spent a little too much time (in my opinion) focusing on Jaxon's brain. she stayed there quite some time and something didnt feel right. asah was with me for the ultrasound but left to go get jordan so i stayed back for my followup appointment.

my heart sank the minute my doctor walked in. she wasnt her usual smiley self. she shot straight with me, something isnt quite right with the way the brain is developing. there is something with the ventricles and fluid in his brain that is not right. the rest of it is all a blur. my heart was beating so fast i really couldnt focus on what else she said. we have an appointment with a specialist for an ultrasound at Women's in Baton Rouge on May 22.

until then, we humbly ask for prayer. i am numb and have no idea what any of this means. i asked the doctor for specific outcomes and she really could not say. i just wanted to be prepared but i really dont know what for. the next 10 days of the unknown will be difficult.

we were scheduled to leave for GA that day but have moved our trip back a bit. please please pray, and i wish i could tell you what for. pray that the "peace of God; which trancends all understanding" will guard our hearts and minds over the next 10 days. pray that i will continue to trust, even when i dont know what's on the other side of this. pray that God will go before us and prepare us for whatever this may be.

thank you.

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10 Comments:

Blogger angie said...

Tara,
I am lifting you guys up in prayer right now and will continue to over the next 10 days. I can't even imagine how scary this is for you...especially having to wait. I am glad to see you and Asah's strength and faith at this time. You are not alone in this, God hears every cry and prayer and you are surrounded by people who will be there for you. If you need anything, please let me know.

Check out my blog at www.themcgintys.blogspot.com and watch the video under the post "Praise you in the storm." I know you have heard that song before, but it helps me a lot when I am in doubt of God not being there or going through a rough time when I just don't understand.

Love yall!

5/12/2008 3:32 PM  
Blogger Hollie said...

Tara-girl,

I love you. I want to give you a BIG hug right now. Know I'm here for talking, if you feel up to it, and of course, know that I'm going to the Throne concerning Jaxon. Please keep me posted. I have a friend that might be emailing you. She could offer up a lot of wisdom and advice. She's been in your shoes. Her name is Kari. She's awesome!

5/12/2008 7:23 PM  
Blogger Shelley said...

I know it is the unthinkable. That verse is by far the best and I am definitely praying for His peace and comfort. He answered the prayers of the placenta. May we all take comfort in His Perfect plan for our lives and Psalm 139!

5/12/2008 7:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tara,
you do not know me nor my family, however I came across your blog through Holly Carson's, her mom works at my dentist. I jsut want you to knwo that you and your entire family will be in my prayers. My heart sank for you because I know that feeling, my daughter was a miracle baby. If there is anything at all that you need please do not hesitate to ask. We will pray for you, and will have our church group pray for you.
Amy Farr- williams

5/12/2008 9:39 PM  
OpenID katiecottle said...

Oh Tara, My heart just sank when I read your blog. I know you are so scared and so unsure of what is going on. I will join with many praying for Jaxon's brain development. I will also pray for the peace that surpasses ALL understanding. Praying for you and lifting up the whole family.

5/12/2008 10:07 PM  
Blogger Renee Weber said...

Tara & Asah,
I am praying for you guys and for little Jaxon...praying for God to accomplish His good will through your lives and baby Jaxon's life.
Love you both!
Renee

5/13/2008 10:10 AM  
Anonymous Kara said...

Tara,
David and I are praying for you and Jaxon and Asah and Jordan. This is such a trying time for you. You have such faith, and you know that God has a plan for you and your family.
Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
I have often taken comfort in these words. I hope they give you comfort as well. May you feel God's hand in your life and may it strengthen you. You are so very loved. Know that we will be there for you, your family and for Jaxon. We pray for good results next visit.

5/13/2008 10:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Tara:

I will speak only good things into existence about Jaxon. I know he will be fine. There is nothing impossible for GOD. Please know that you are not alone on your walk of faith. Faith is being sure of what we hope for AND certain of what we do not see!

Lots of love,

Cherrell Campbell-Street
Tifton, GA

5/13/2008 12:09 PM  
Blogger Ann said...

Tara,
You don't know me, but I'm a friend of Ricky and Joy's. I've followed your blog from time to time and enjoyed watching Jordan grow. He is such a little boy.
Please know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers daily. God loves you and will not forsake you!

5/14/2008 11:35 AM  
Blogger pamb said...

Tara,
Your and Asah's faith is so strong... God is by your side right now. Santo and I have total faith that all will be well with Jaxon and your health. Remember that you have so many family members raising you up in prayer and love. We love you, Asah, Jordan, and Jaxon.

5/14/2008 1:45 PM  

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